Another year....

Another year has flown by and I still can't believe it. It feels like 2 weeks ago I was celebrating the beginning of 2006 with two guys I consider my brothers. So many things have happened that I don't know if I've digested all of it. And like every year, I've learned new things and reinforced some old beliefs.

I've come to realize that the absolute best things in life are free. Friendship, love. I'm so happy that I can honestly say that I do know who my friends are. I've learned that the path less traveled is the path I always tend to follow, and it's worked wonders. I've learned that there are people who are irreplaceable, and that even though, by some weird act of fate, they are no longer a part of your life, they're still a part of you and will always be with you, and that no matter how hard you try, nobody will ever be able to replace them. I've learned to love the surprises that life throws at you. That if you open yourself up to new things, events, situations, opportunities, that sometimes just saying yes, is one of the best things you can ever do for yourself. I've learned that grudges are useless, and that people, no matter how well you think you know them, will always, in some way or the other, surprise you. Sometimes in a good way, sometimes in a bad way, but most of the time in an unexpected way.

I have truly come to learn that just because, that one person that made you smile for sooo long, also makes you cry out of frustration, and anger, and just.. blah!.. it never means that you let those tears cloud the good memories. My friend is irreplaceable. One of the best people I've ever met. Sincere, honest. Gave me hope, when it was all I really wanted without even knowing it. I learned that I need to take charge of my life, and that when I want something to happen, I just have to make it happen. I've grown to see who I am, and how I am.. and "I luv it". LOL. I love it. I love it. Sure, the tears hurt, but at the end of the day, my memories are priceless. I found exactly what I had been looking for, and I didn't even know. It's everything, but at the same time can't become something. And as weird as this may sound... I don't mind it.

I've never felt so happy and content, and just WOW with myself before. I have friends who I love with all my heart. Some are here with me, and some are back home... And it's just great to know that I can call anyone of them up, or talk to them online and the conversations will flow as if I had never come to DR.

Surprises.
I've had a lot of those this years. Some good. Some bad. And some that just blew me away. I think I really am on my way to learn how to put things behind me and leave them there. I can't say enough about how much I love, and appreciate my friends who have given me soo much support that it's unbelieveable.

Some things just come back and hit you in the face, or in the heart.... whichever you prefer. And you're like "OH MY GOD! WHAT THE HELL?!". And I got that surprise, and it blew me away... and I didn't know how to respond to it. What to think about it. And it's just, weird. HAHA. It's like... WOW. Looking back... who whould have thought. Certainly not me.

And then.... Life. In general. My life is good. My life is great. And I hope for it to stay that way. I've been blessed on so many different levels that sometimes it's just hard to believe. But I've also learned that life doesn't give you second chances, and if it does, it's rare.

I can't say I'm the best of persons, but I'm not the worst. I don't put myself ahead of everyone, but I always come first. It's my golden rule. I have to be able to help myself in order to help those around me.

I've learned that even though things don't go your way, they sometimes have the best outcome. I can't change the things that happen, but what I can do is decide how I will let them affect me. I can either close myself off to everyone and go back to square one, or be willing to put myself on the line for the things I want. You never know until you try, and all I'm trying to do is end up with the least amount of regrets possible. I'm still the person that just waits, but that doesn't mean that while I'm waiting I'm letting my life pass me by. It just means that I've learned to wait in a different way. People don't always change, but you change with them. I don't claim to be something I'm not. I'm stubborn as hell, difficult as only God knows, but I think that people have learned that if they have patience, and just stick around, it's worth it.

I was told once that there are people exactly like me out there. And at the time I was told that it was completely true, because I was trying to fit into this mold so I could "stand out" but in reality all I was doing was going unnoticed. Good thing is, that's not true anymore. I'm not trying to fit a mold, I'm trying to get away from it because I will never let myself become a stereotype, or be generalized, or be analyzed by people who have no idea the type of person I am, or could be. And it's their loss. I'm happy to say that, even thoughI may not be the best thing out there, but I am one of the good things. I don't look for other people's validation of me. I have nothing to prove to anyone, because if you know me, and if you know the person I am, then there's no need for me to show you who I am and what I am capable of doing. The only person that I need to prove myself to is me, and that doesn't change. I am what I am, and that's how I like it.

And looking back at things from before, It's hit that... wow.... people are incredible. LOL.

This has been a fantastic year. I've laughed, I've cried, I've fought, I've come to realizations, I've taken chances, and at the end of the day, I wouldn't change a thing. I do believe everything happens for a reason, and as long as the changes help me become a better me, let them come.

Why Be Average?

LOL.

Being unconventional rocks!

Observations... Part Une.

LOL. Yes. My observations include myself. Because, well, in the end aren't we just analyzing ourselves? I mean, in our search for the "meaning of life", aren't people really just looking for justification for their answers? I don't know if I happen to be looking for the meaning of life, but then again with me who knows. I tend to surprise myself on a daily basis.

Do people actually stop, sit, and just think about the meaning of life? Or what the meaning of their life should be? I can't sit still for more than 2 hours, much less give the meaning of life so much thought. Call me what you will, but I think people tend to make too much of it. LOL. Don't get me wrong, if your life has no meaning your pretty much screwed. But... isn't life meant to be lived and not thought? What good does it do a person to sit and ponder where their life should be heading, when while sitting, their life is passing by... without stopping.

But then again.. This is coming from a person who likes to spend her time lying in bed all day, playing around with Photoshop and not studying for her life... I mean career in Medicine. LOL. Yup, I am your future physician.... How much faith does that give you? A lot? No? Well... Look at the bright side.... I'll be a physician with Photoshop knowledge. Still no faith? Well, then you suck! LOL.

Yeah.. did I forget to mention I'm extremely random? LOL!

Another thing I've noticed. When you call people out on their truths, they think you're a bitch. I mean, I've done this, the being called out and thought the person's a bitch, and the other thing. LOL. But when a person's right, I gotta give it to them.

And another thing. When people say "out with the old, in with the new", in other words starting with a clean slate... Yeah... in 85% of the cases it's BS. LOL. I mean, I've tried the whole "oh yeah, I'm done with that. I'm moving on. Blah blah blah." And then a week later, it's back to the same old routine. But, you know. It's hard not looking back. And it's worse when you have that little bit of hope that maybe something, anything is gonna change. And that's when you really get screwed. LOL. I vote that in order to forget about things that have hurt you in the past, you get amnesia. Or acquire a selective memory problem. LOL. Whatever works right? No? Ok... Yeah. The past makes you who you are in the present, and the present helps you become who you will be in the future... Does that make sense?... Well, to me it does... LOL!

Anyways.. Yeah.. Enough... I have to try to motivate myself to read. LOL!

Because I was bored.......

Estaba... que me moria del aburrimiento... Entonces... I started doing those online tests things... Dique what planet I should rule and such.. LOL.... Mira tu... no Yo.... LOL:

Your Quirk Factor: 69%
You're so quirky, it's hard for you to tell the difference between quirky and normal.No doubt about it, there's little about you that's "normal" or "average."

You Have Good Karma
In general, you like to do the right thing when it comes to others.Your caring personality really shines through.Sure, you have your moments of weakness - and occasionally act out.But, all in all, you're karma is good... even with those few dark spots.

You Are Somewhat Machiavellian
You're not going to mow over everyone to get ahead...But you're also powerful enough to make things happen for yourself.You understand how the world works, even when it's an ugly place.You just don't get ugly yourself - unless you have to!

Your Personality Profile
You are sexy, powerful, and bold.You're full of passion and energy...Sometimes this passion has a dark side.You feel most alive when you're seducing someone.You never fail to get someone's attention.Quick minded, you're also quick to lose your temper!

You Have Your Sarcastic Moments
While you're not sarcastic at all times, you definitely have a cynical edge.In your opinion, not all people are annoying. Some are dead!And although you do have your genuine moments, you can't help getting your zingers in.Some people might be a little hurt by your sarcasm, but it's more likely they think you're hilarious.

Your Love Life Secrets Are
Looking back on your life, you will have a few true loves.You've been deeply wounded in the past, and you're still recovering from that hurt.You want to be with someone who's a success. A person with the right job, right family, right clothes...In fights, you speak your mind and don't hold back. You know you're right, and you can get quite angry about it.Getting over a break-up doesn't take long. Easy come, easy go.

Your Ideal Relationship is Casual Dating
Maybe you're looking for love...But mostly you're looking for fun.You could get serious with the right person.For now, though, you're enjoying playing the field.

You Are 56% Passionate, 44% Compassionate
You possess an ideal balance of passion and compassion.You definitely can get swept away and lose your head a little.But you're rarely a fool for love!

You Are a Natural Flirt
Believe it or not, you're a really effective flirt.And you're so good, you hardly notice that you're flirting.Your attitude and confidence make you a natural flirt.And the fact that you don't know it is just that more attractive!

Your Seduction Style: The Natural
You don't really try to seduce people... it just seems to happen.Fun loving and free spirited, you bring out the inner child in people.You are spontaneous, sincere, and unpretentious - a hard combo to find!People drop their guard around you, and find themselves falling fast.

You Are 40% Extrovert, 60% Introvert
You're a bit outgoing, a bit reservedLike most people, you enjoy being socialBut you also value the time you have aloneYou have struck a good balance!

Your Love Style is Eros
For you, love is all about the passion!And chances are, you're currently in love.You have a strong physical response to love...And you are great at committing (As long as the person makes your toes curl!)

Entonces....

Me encontre a mi misma cuando buscaba perderme...
virtud o defecto, mirar hacia adentro.
Me refleje en varios tu dejando de ser yo
hasta que recorde ser para mi perfectamente bien.
Y ser o estar o no ser y no estar no es una eleccion ni un dilema
es un estado redundante que perpetua.

A Little Piece of Me

Simple girls, in complicated worlds make if far where they belong.
Because forever does exist, and all you have to do is believe, and it
being that I believe in me, that's all I'll ever need.
Because every time I don't conform, my life gets better... that's for sure.
And every time the sun sets, I close my eyes and see a new day.
I see daybreak.

Because in love I'll never fail, I've found my friends who keep there,
Holding on to my crazy dreams that someday I'll find a dreamer just like me.
Some one else who won't conform, and lead his life to the beat of his drum,
while I walk beside him with my flute.

I've come to know what heartbreak is,
But in the end I believe, that if things are meant to be, they'll be.

But I haven't met him yet, but I will keep searching because in the end
I know I'll have my friends regardless.

MUAH! LOL....
I don't know that it makes sense.. but like someone would say... blah!